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Wednesday, December 1, 2010

I am stretched rubber band

I am a stretched rubber band...

I have a theory, not trying to be too philosophical about this but think about it...a rubber band, once been stretched will never go back to its original form.

I have way too much time in my head. The kids are away for a week to Seremban and Haris is much too occupied with the biggest event of the year for Hyundai thus he's mostly not around. By the time I reached home it's always late and I am greeted by an empty & dark house. It's kinda lonely though. I miss those munchkins no doubt about it. But I don't mind the quietness. I don't rush back, instead trying to catch up with the "single" life stuff that I usually won't easily get - hit the gym and spend hours there, visit the saloon and get my hair cut, long hot shower, eat maggi mee, reading the magazines, holding on the remote, watching those darn DVDs that I bought but never had the chance to view...Was thinking to catch up with the girls too...but too lazy to arrange one.

At the back of my mind, I truly miss the noise, the chaos, the rush, the dirty diapers, the split milk...I just missed surounded by the usual stuff, the normal stuff. Don't get me wrong, I am enjoying this "single" moment but that's the thing, I am a stretched rubber band. Even for a while, I am always be reminded of what I am now. I am a mom and my life are never the same without my kids! What a wonderful feelings to be wanted & needed eventhough through a constant nag, whine, heartache..and headache. You actually do not want to be left alone. You can't go back to what you were...cos you are too strectched up.

I used to be disturbed by the stretch marks I have on my's ugly. But I don't want to get rid of it (eventhough at the beginning I've tried all sorts of lotion or cream to prevent any sorts of pregnancy marks) But since I've been strectched all different kinds of way now...I am accepting my physical changes now. My stretch marks are my constant reminder of  my privillage. It is the wonderful mark from the labour of love bringing up my 3 wonderful children.